{"id":16041,"date":"2011-12-05T12:00:16","date_gmt":"2011-12-05T12:00:16","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/?p=16041"},"modified":"2011-11-28T19:48:22","modified_gmt":"2011-11-28T19:48:22","slug":"getting-even","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/2011\/12\/getting-even\/","title":{"rendered":"Getting Even"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>A very loud, unattractive, mean woman walked into a market with her two kids, yelling obscenities at them all the way through the entrance.<\/p>\n<p>The market greeter says, &#8220;Good morning, welcome. Nice children you have there. Are they twins?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>The ugly woman stopped yelling long enough to say, &#8220;Hell no they ain&#8217;t. Oldest one&#8217;s 9 and the other one&#8217;s 7. Why the hell would you think they&#8217;re twins? Are you blind, or just stupid?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;I&#8217;m neither blind nor stupid,\u201d replied the greeter. &#8220;I just couldn&#8217;t believe you got laid twice.&#8221;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>A very loud, unattractive, mean woman walked into a market with her two kids, yelling obscenities at them all the way through the entrance.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[42],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-16041","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-joke-of-the-week"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16041","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=16041"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16041\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=16041"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=16041"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=16041"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}