{"id":18247,"date":"2012-04-02T12:00:06","date_gmt":"2012-04-02T11:00:06","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/?p=18247"},"modified":"2012-03-27T15:40:19","modified_gmt":"2012-03-27T14:40:19","slug":"gifts","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/2012\/04\/gifts\/","title":{"rendered":"Gifts"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>It was Thursday evening and Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really mad.<\/p>\n<p>She told him, &#8220;Tomorrow morning I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE!!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway.<\/p>\n<p>Confused, the wife put on her robe, ran out and brought the box inside the house.<\/p>\n<p>She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.<\/p>\n<p>Bob has been missing since Friday.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>It was Thursday evening and Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really mad.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[42],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-18247","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-joke-of-the-week"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18247","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=18247"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18247\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=18247"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=18247"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=18247"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}