{"id":19234,"date":"2012-05-28T12:00:39","date_gmt":"2012-05-28T11:00:39","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/?p=19234"},"modified":"2012-05-23T16:23:55","modified_gmt":"2012-05-23T15:23:55","slug":"lawyer-in-hell","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/2012\/05\/lawyer-in-hell\/","title":{"rendered":"Lawyer in Hell"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>A lawyer died and was delivered into the devil&#8217;s hands. &#8220;You will be spending eternity here, but I&#8217;ll let you pick your own room from three I&#8217;ll show you,&#8221; the devil said.<\/p>\n<p>In the first room were thousands of people standing on their heads on a brick floor. &#8220;I don&#8217;t like that,&#8221; said the man. &#8220;Show me the second.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>In the second room were thousands of people standing on their heads on a wood floor. &#8220;Well, that&#8217;s better than brick,&#8221; the man said, &#8220;but show me the third.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>In the third, thousands of people were standing ankle-deep in a room full of maggot infested garbage, all drinking coffee.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;I&#8217;ll choose this room,&#8221; he said.<\/p>\n<p>Into the room he went and the door slammed behind him.<\/p>\n<p>Immediately, the voice of a minor demon rang out, &#8220;OK, coffee break is over, back on your heads.&#8221;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>A lawyer died and was delivered into the devil&#8217;s hands. &#8220;You will be spending eternity here, but I&#8217;ll let you pick your own room from three I&#8217;ll show you,&#8221; the devil said.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[42],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-19234","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-joke-of-the-week"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19234","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=19234"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19234\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=19234"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=19234"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=19234"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}