{"id":7903,"date":"2010-10-25T00:00:41","date_gmt":"2010-10-24T22:00:41","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/?p=7903"},"modified":"2010-10-19T18:57:25","modified_gmt":"2010-10-19T16:57:25","slug":"scots","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/2010\/10\/scots\/","title":{"rendered":"Scots"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>A Scottish daughter proudly announced to her father, &#8220;Today I saved two dollars, I ran after the street car.&#8221;\u00a0 The father said, &#8220;You should have run after a taxi instead, you would have saved a lot more money!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>****<\/p>\n<p>Why do Scots never buy a refrigerator?\u00a0 Because they are not sure whether the light really turns off when they close the door.<\/p>\n<p>****<\/p>\n<p>An Englishman and a Scotsman are removing the wallpaper in their respective apartments.\u00a0 The Englishman is renovating, the Scotsman is moving.<\/p>\n<p>****<\/p>\n<p>Someone fell from a train platform.\u00a0 Many people wanted to help pull him back up before the train arrived.\u00a0 They stretched their hand toward the man lying down on the track, shouting, &#8220;Give me your hand!&#8221;\u00a0 But he refused.\u00a0 Finally one realized that he was a Scotsman and said, &#8220;Take my hand,&#8221; and he took it.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>A Scottish daughter proudly announced to her father, &#8220;Today I saved two dollars, I ran after the street car.&#8221; <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[42],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-7903","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-joke-of-the-week"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7903","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=7903"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7903\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=7903"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=7903"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=7903"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}