{"id":85651,"date":"2017-01-23T12:00:07","date_gmt":"2017-01-23T12:00:07","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/?p=85651"},"modified":"2017-01-21T19:35:13","modified_gmt":"2017-01-21T19:35:13","slug":"quickies-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/2017\/01\/quickies-2\/","title":{"rendered":"Quickies"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>George Bush came late to a cabinet meeting. He explained that he wanted to finish a puzzle. He proudly said that on the package it said &#8220;for three years&#8221;, but he finished it in only eight hours.<\/p>\n<p>*****<\/p>\n<p>Two aliens in their spaceship approached earth. One pointed out to the other, &#8220;Look, they have space weapons.&#8221; The other asked, &#8220;Does that indicate that a form of higher intelligence has developed on earth?&#8221; The first one replied, &#8220;I don&#8217;t think so, because they are aiming those weapons at themselves.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>*****<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;I&#8217;ve had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me and the second one didn&#8217;t.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>*****<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>George Bush came late to a cabinet meeting. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[42],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-85651","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-joke-of-the-week"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/85651","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=85651"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/85651\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=85651"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=85651"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.transcend.org\/tms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=85651"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}