From Church Bulletins

JOKE OF THE WEEK, 19 Apr 2010

Dietrich Fischer – TRANSCEND Media Service

“The outreach committee has visited every family that is not afflicted with a church.”

“Don’t let worry kill you–let the church help.”

“Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church.”

“The rosebud on the altar this morning is to announce the birth of David Alan Belzer, the sin of Rev. and Mrs. Julius Belzer.”

“The reverend is on vacation. Massages can be given to his secretary.”

“This afternoon, there will be a meeting in the South and North ends of the church. Children will be baptized at both ends.”

“Smile at someone who is hard to love.  Say ‘hell’ to someone who doesn’t care much about you.”

“For those of you who have children and don’t know it, we have a nursery downstairs.”

“Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles, and other items to be recycled.  Proceeds will be used to cripple children.”

“Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM. Please use the back door.”


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This article originally appeared on Transcend Media Service (TMS) on 19 Apr 2010.

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